What stories do we tell ourselves, over and over and over again?
The truth is we are constantly spinning a tale, at least in our own minds, to explain our current life in relation to What Was Before. It dictates how we view our world, what is happening to us now, and how our futures will play out.
That’s a lot of impact for something that we’re largely unaware of!
Being ever on the path of self-growth, this month I’ve been thinking a lot about these stories, trying to find new areas that I haven’t brought to light yet that may be stalling my own progress.
The hard part, of course, is how do we see what we can’t see?
Another person can act as a good mirror, pointing out things you’re so used to saying or doing that you don’t realize it anymore. The difficulty is that where personal relationships are involved, it is rare to get an unbiased view. After all, any change in your perspective can ripple out to those around you and most people don’t want to disturb their world. (Incidentally, this is where it’s great to have a coach.)
If you want to start working through this on your own, there are two useful places to begin to notice your own stories:
1. Anyplace you tell yourself you “can’t” or “shouldn’t” do, try, or say something.
Why? What are the unwritten ‘rules’ in play here? What do you think is going to happen? Why do you think that? Where did that idea come from? Is the outcome that you expect absolutely guaranteed?
2. Anytime you get triggered, react strongly, or (dare I say) overreact.
When you’re reacting to something that someone has said or done, there is something in you needing to be released. What exactly are you reacting to? Why does it affect you? What does it remind you of? Ultimately, what is it reflecting in yourself, in some way?
The more we can peel the layers of these false stories away, the freer we feel, and the more we can live the kind of life we actually want to live: that amazing, energetic, joyful life that is simply waiting for you.